When Yitzy made his first siyum on Shas Mishnayos at the age of 11, the menahel encouraged the family to celebrate it with a huge siyum. The teachers at Yitzy’s cheder not only accommodate his unique needs, they also celebrate them. “They help you speak to your kids’ school and act as an advocate, speaking to the cheder about what kind of changes they need, what’s not working, and why.” The Ofek School also provides services for parents. “They realize they’re not the only kid who thinks the way they do.” “They’re able to connect with other children who are like them, which socially is a big deal,” says Miriam. Their program, which Yitzy joined one day a week in lieu of his regular cheder, provides students with the opportunity to work on things on their level, and helps the children feel less isolated. Yitzy, now in middle school, was able to benefit from the support of the Ofek School for Gifted Children in Jerusalem. So how can I blame the school for not knowing what to do with him?” One in a thousand means that a rebbi could teach 30 students a year for 30 years and still never encounter a child like my son. “But a relative who works in education put it into perspective. “At first, the number didn’t really mean anything to me,” admits Miriam. In second grade, they told me I should get him tested for ADHD.”Īfter Yitzy went through a series of neurological testing to get to the bottom of his behavior, the final assessment revealed that he didn’t have ADHD - his intelligence level was 1/1000, putting him in the profoundly gifted category. “He bounced all over the place,” says Miriam, who is raising her family in Israel. Miriam’s bright and active son, Yitzy, couldn’t keep still in school. Their extra sensitivity, awareness, and intensity, referred to as overexcitabilities (or OEs, see sidebar for more), have a real impact on the way they experience the world - and the way parents experience raising them. Gifted children are often found to have an increased response to stimuli. If it sounds intense, that’s because it is. A gifted kid may not be able to sit still through a class because of intense energy levels, or because of boredom - a class on basic science can be agonizing for a kid who’d rather discuss the composition of the universe. Gifted kids can stand out because of their different intellectual capabilities, but they can also be different for other reasons, like having a quirky sense of humor, firing off questions intensely, and being singularly focused on a topic. In some locales, the school system itself screens students for giftedness. Families typically seek out a trained professional to assess their child individually and to provide recommendations for how to meet the child’s specific needs. While the requirements can vary according to state or organizational guidelines, one way of measuring giftedness is through IQ testing, with 100 being an average score, and 120 and above considered gifted. Only about two to five percent of children meet the criteria for being gifted. Being gifted isn’t defined by intelligence alone - it’s more about the brain working in a different way, like showing advanced thinking and comprehension beyond age level, exhibiting emotional intensity at a young age, having a heightened sense of self-awareness, being highly curious, and having an excellent memory. These days, people throw around the term “gifted” casually, but the truth is, the majority of bright children aren’t gifted. It turned out Solly wasn’t autistic - he was highly gifted. The school recommended getting him assessed for autism.Īfter dragging their feet for a few months, they finally set up an appointment with a child psychologist to do an evaluation. He was often in his own world in class, he had some quirky mannerisms, and he wasn’t interacting as much with the other children. They told them that they’d never had a kid like their son before. When Solly was three, the teachers at his preschool in Seattle, Washington would make comments like, “Oh, he’s so unique, he’s so special, he’s so quirky.” Then the school called Rachel and her husband in for a meeting. He enjoys looking through reference books to find mistakes. Solly went on to memorize the periodic table of elements at age four, and his current fascination at age six is geography. My husband and I thought it was a little early, but he was our oldest, so we didn’t have anything to compare it to.” “He learned the alphabet in the span of the weekend. “When my son Solly was 18 months old, I let him play in the crib with some alphabet flashcards that I found in the Airbnb we were staying in for a wedding,” shares Rachel. What’s it like when your child really is significantly smarter than average?
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